They jokes
What does your mum and Istanbul have in common?
They are all insane comebacks!!!
Why can’t the employee tell dirty laundry jokes?
Because they always come out clean.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
In communist Russia there is no discrimination. White, black, African, American, British and Asian. They all go to Gulag eventually.
Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24 hours, so they just called it a "day".
What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common? They both let little kids sit on their lap.
Say what you want about pedophiles, but at least they don't shoot up schools.
How do skeletons have sex?
They bone each other.
They found water on Mars. Mars:1 Africa:0
What do you get when you put a suicide bomber in a wheel chair? An RC-XD.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Orphans don't get picked.
Why don't Indians play soccer?
Because every time they get a corner, they build a shop on it.
Lil Timmy and Lil Susie are taking a bath together. Lil Susie looks down and says, "Hey, what's that?" Lil Timmy looks down and says, "Oh, that, that's only my little red race car." They continue on with their bath.
Then Lil Timmy looks down and says, "Hey, what's that?" Lil Susie looks down and says, "Oh, that, that's only my little red race car garage." They continue with their bath. Then Lil Susie says, "Hey, what if we try to put your little red race car in my little red race car garage?"
The parents downstairs then hear a bloody scream. They rush upstairs and then say, "What's wrong?" Lil Susie says, "Well, Lil Timmy tried to put his little red race car in my little red race car garage but the back wheels wouldn't fit, so we cut them off."
Where do feminists go when they die? "Hell's Kitchen."
Twin Towers ordered Little Caesars but they got jets.
Did you know Cobain had dandruff? Yep. They found his head and shoulders all over the back of his couch.
If you're ever angry, go ahead and punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why are Americans so good at solving Rubik’s cubes?
Because they have a history of separating colors.
Why do orphans become criminals? Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.
How are giants and strippers alike?
They both grind men's bones to make their bread.
Why is an orphan so scared of the dark?
They don't have a dad to check the closet.
I don't like 9/11 jokes; they have a tendency to crash and burn.