They jokes
What’s the difference between someone’s wife and a plate?
They both have to stay in the kitchen.
Why do they make glow-in-the-dark condoms?
So gay people can play Star Wars.
What does an orphan and Spider-Man have in common?
They have no "why home" 👹
What does Michael Jackson and Chef from South Park have in common?
They both say "Hello children!"
Reverend Mother walks into the convent and announces:
"Sisters, our carrots have been delivered!"
Nuns exclaim: "Hurray! Carrots!"
Reverend Mother: "They are grated carrots, though."
Nuns: "Ugh! No, thank you then..."
I threw a paper airplane at the twin sisters. The teacher was upset. I guess they don't read the news.
Why did the orphan sit alone in the corner?
They wanted some family time.
Why can't Indians play baseball? Because every time they hit a corner, they open a shop.
When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.
“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”
What do Germans do to ask a question? They salute.
Why are women in love with plastic because they had a plastic "galflalflflfalfl?"
I hope there are no women on here because they just aren't that funny.
What do strippers and peanut butter have in common?
They both like oil.
Your mom's so fat, when she entered a fat contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"
A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked...
"What's this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?"
Her husband replied, "It's a proxy war between Russia and NATO."
"Oh, right. How's it going?"
"Well," he replied, "so far we've lost 200,000 soldiers, 4,000 tanks, 500 aircraft, numerous helicopters, loads of armoured vehicles and artillery pieces along with our 'flag ship'."
"Wow! What about NATO?"
"They haven't turned up yet."
One day a man buys a rope to commit suicide, but his friend stops him.
They go to a school with lots of happy kids. The guy feels better after a mag.
Yo mama is so fat, when she wore yellow, the kids thought they missed the bus.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Why are blind people bad at catching things? Because they never see it coming.
What's the difference between YouTube adverts and orphans?
Most get skipped no matter how interesting they are.