They jokes
Why are most politicians in the closet or gay?
Because all they can do is mandate.
Ever had that feeling that suicidal people are a big contributor to the razor blade industry?
Well, they aren't.
Why?
They aren't repeated customers.
You text someone to ask them why they snobbed you. Then they snob you again.
1, 2 look at your shoes.
3, 4 they look better than yours.
5, 6 you have no friends.
7, 8 you look like a ape.
9, 10 don't you like men?
11, 12 hell naw I like females.
Yo mama is so old that when she was in history class as a kid, all they learned about was themselves!
Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.
Two men walk into a bar, no clue how they didn't see it.
What do babies and explosives have in common?
They both make a noise when you throw them.
Son: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Dad: Don't know, why?
Son: Because they taste funny.
Man, I didn't know they put Humpty Dumpty back together!
I was walking with my black best friend, and he was meeting my parents, and after I got there, they said, "Who's this?" I said, "Well, I own him."
Why are the Chinese bad at baseball?
Because they ate all the bats.
I just went to India and thought, "Why do they have so many sniper hitmen?" It turns out the red dot isn't a sniper laser.
Yo mama so fat that when she went to the fatty competition, they said no because they didn't want professionals.
What is Ronaldo's favorite fruit?
Oranges because they have vitamin C.
Yesterday, I was on a reality TV show where they locked me up with all those smelly monkeys from the Leger Zoo. It was complete madness.
One time I was playing a bongo at a Chinese restaurant.
But they were competing against a Cuban restaurant and killed me.
My bro’s parents died, but he didn’t know why.
Turns out they died because he was a failure, and he would be going to an orphanage in 4 days.
I was doing some karate the other day at the studio.
They kicked me out because I was doing “kungi fui.”
Why do gay people only stand crooked? Cuz they can’t be straight.