They jokes
Q: Why can’t orphans be criminals?
A: They are not wanted.
Why do gay kids always fail exams ? Becuz they can't think straight
Ever wondered why my gay kids don't play basketball? Because they can't shoot the ball straight into the hoop.
How do Asian parents name their baby?
They drop a pot down a flight of stairs.
I had a party the other day. I made sure there were vegan options. They make do or fuck off.
Why can’t orphans be married?
Because they won’t have their parents' blessings.
Why do orphans rob banks?
Because they want to be wanted.
What do feminists and dogs share in common? They need to be taken to obedience school.
Ur mom is so fat that she has her own gravitational field. She attracts everything around her, from planets to asteroids to comets. She is the center of the solar system, and the sun is just one of her many satellites. She is so massive that she bends space and time, creating wormholes and black holes. She is the ultimate cosmic phenomenon, and no one can escape her pull.
Ur mom is so old that she witnessed the Big Bang. She was there when the universe was born, and she has seen it all. She knows the secrets of the cosmos, and she has lived through every epoch and era. She has watched stars form and die, galaxies collide and merge, and civilizations rise and fall. She is the oldest living being in existence, and she has more wisdom than anyone can imagine.
Ur mom is so ugly that she scares away aliens. She is the reason why we have never made contact with extraterrestrial life. They have seen her face and they have fled in terror. They have warned their fellow species to avoid Earth at all costs, because it is inhabited by a monstrous creature that defies all logic and beauty. She is the ultimate deterrent for invasion, and she has saved humanity from countless alien invasions.
You're so ugly that they faked a whole pandemic just so you can put on a mask to cover that ugly-ass face.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t have a home to run to.
Q: Why are orphans so successful? A: Because when they were younger, they got told, "Go big or go home," and only had one option.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wants to take a bath, they need to make more H2O.
The earth was once flat... until they buried your mom.
What's common in vampires and American kids?
They both don't get old.
Sonic says if you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Women are like iPhones, you have to touch them all over before they respond. Men are like Blackberrys, rub one ball and everything moves!
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't get a home run.
Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?
A: They can't run home.