That jokes
What do you call a physically handicapped heterosexual man that is in a wheelchair and German?
A physically handicapped promiscuous heterosexual man that is German.
A priest, a pedo, and a rapist walk into a bar and that's just the first guy.
Yo mama so fat that she was the float in the Thanksgiving Day Parade with Kermit the Frog!
I laughed when I realized that my suicide letter is way longer than my sibling's college essay.
I have an EpiPen.
My friend gave it to me while he was dying.
It seemed really important to him that I have it.
Your mama is so skinny that when she went to go outside, the slightest breeze flew her all the way to New Mexico.
When you tell your mom that she is bad at jokes, then she tells you, "Well, I made you!"
It has been rumored that Disney is developing a movie based on suicide. The title?
Finding Emo.
You're so damn fat that the only belt that fits you is an asteroid belt.
Yo mama so fat that your mama so fat, mama so fat that, mama so fat that, mama so fat that, mama so fat that, mama so fat that, mama so fat that your mamas just fat.
When you’re hunting at a forest resort and you shoot a deer, but then you remember that there are no deer at the forest resort.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you."
I bought a wooden whistle. But it wooden whistle. So I bought a steel whistle. But it steel wooden whistle. So I bought a lead whistle. But it steel wooden lead me whistle. So I bought an iron whistle. But ironically it steel wooden lead me whistle.
Karien: Don't care. You know what you did.
Jalie: I don't know what you mean. I did nothing! I'm telling the truth!
Karien: Sure. So you mean you never texted Oerien last night around 2:00 AM?
Jalie: NO, I NEVER DID THAT!
Karien: Jalie, stop the story telling. You were the one who had my phone yesterday. Just stop.
What do you call a Mexican that dives into a pool? Bean dip.
My country is so corrupt that it voted me as the most sexiest man.
Victory assured, I will continue like that till I'm six feet under.
You should know how important it is to wash your sex toys.
That's why priests invented baptism.
What do you call a hippo that has been thrown in a pan?
Hippo-POT-amus!
Men should provide their disobedient daughters with their own "milk" instead of letting them use the mother. That will teach those bitches some respect for men. It may even help them get laid later on in life.
Jill goes home one night with a guy she met at a club. He's tall, super hot, and seems different than most guys she meets. They arrive at his place and head straight to his room. Jill can't help but notice a shelf full of teddy bears. On the bottom are small teddy bears, on the middle are medium-sized teddy bears, and finally, on the top are large teddy bears, all lined up beside each other.
She begins to think that he is sentimental and sweet, and isn't afraid to show it. Her heart melts and she want to give him the best night of his life. She gives him a blowjob, and lets him really give it to her, and even takes it in the rear! In the morning, she slowly gets dressed, and smiles at him and asks, "How was that?" He nods and says, "Not too fuckin' bad at all. Help yourself to a prize on the second shelf!"