That jokes
My step mom walked in naked once. I sky rocketed that day. I was 12.
Roses are red,
My nuts are bigger than your small balls, that's why I get all the bitches.
What do you call a Chinese hooker that won't get on her knees?
Cantonese...
Did you know that "girlfriend" at the end, it starts with "end." So does "boyfriend," and "friend" have "end" at the end of it, but "family" at the end it "ily" I love you.
Your dad is so stupid that when he jumped the fence, the gate was open.
What happens to an orphan that gets on house arrest?
They get set free.
One day, there were three people: a mom and two kids. One of the kids walks up and asks her mom why she was named Rose. Her mom told her that she ate a rose petal when she was born; that is why she was named Rose.
Then the second child walked up and yelled, "Ahhhhhh!" and the mom said, "Shut up, Billy Goat!"
New degree plans announced by Cornell University:
- Frat Studies, includes classes in acquiring ketamine and arranging threesomes with your homeboy and some random girl.
- Sorority Studies, includes classes in oral sex, binge drinking, and bullshitting after the fact.
- Consent Theory, teaches the new generation that "Yes" means "No" and your problems can all be solved by regretting your own poor decision-making (the shop's still open btw).
Your mom is so fat that she thought Eminem is a candy.
The teacher made us present a slideshow to introduce ourselves.
Mine is bright and colorful with music. It was so good that a kid started dancing!
Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.
My girlfriend was cheating in Uno.
She's not the only one who can play that game.
Yo mama so fat that Thanos had to snap twice!
You're so poor that when you drink water from a cup, people flick a coin into it.
Like Markgeraldnasol and his Pokemon Jokes.
What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
What is the world's strongest material?
The tree that Paul Walker hit.
You know, you should adopt a pet. So then you can feel the pain that your parents felt when they adopted you… wait… also the regret after.
What did one mouse say to the other mouse when it tried to steal the cheese?
"That's nacho cheese!"
My friend said to me that I am gay. My response? I’m as straight as that pole that your mum danced on last night.