That jokes
Best friend makes joke about 9/11.
Me: My pop was a part of that!
Best friend: So sorry!
Me: My pop was the pilot of the plane, he flew through 89 floors.
Yo mama so ugly that when she went to an ugly contest, they said she wasn’t allowed because no professionals were allowed.
My dad was in the plane in 9/11, and he was the smart one that convinced everyone. He said, "We're fucked."
What do you call a gay man that is not a vegetarian?
A cocksucker.
Prince, do you love that girl Gwen more than me? Remember when you were at my house?
How can you tell that a woman is asking for sex? Wait for her to drop a bomb on you.
What was the thing that Beethoven used the most?
THE OVEN! (BeethOVEN)
Did you know that an orphan can take a selfie and a family photo at the same time?
What is a pizza that an orphan can’t have?
A family pizza.
If you ever get chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire.
They're trained for that.
During Covid, lockdown went on for so long that even the agoraphobics got cabin fever.
A science teacher got on the Space Shuttle Challenger after winning a contest out of 11,000 other teachers.
Imagine being one of the losing teachers in that contest, watching the Space Shuttle Challenger, and thinking, "Talking about dodging a bullet!"
Friends, who's your barber? They mess up big time.
Me.
You're just jealous because my dad cuts my hair for free, and you have to be paying 30 dollars just for that short-ass cut.
Why did the priest go to the clothing sale at Walmart?
He heard that little boy's pants were half off.
Doctor: I’m so sorry, sir, but you only have a couple months left.
The sir: My children will be devastated.
Doctor: But I have a shot that can change that.
The sir: Whatever it takes.
*Suppressed gunshots*
Yo mama so fat that when she sat on an AirPod Pro, she turned it into an iPad!
This website is darker than the kid that got arrested last week.
My mom wanted me to brush my hair.
And I just told her that even pet animals don't like their hair brushed...
The Queen: "I've had a few medical problems this year. I'm so old that my pussy is haunted!"
What is an owl that wears armor?