Galaxy jokes
It’s me back at it again.
The earth was flat till they buried yo mama!!!
Which way did the cow jump over the moon?
The Milky Way!
If I'm the night guard at the Samsung store, does that make me a guardian of the galaxy?
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and was thinking to myself, "Where the f*ck is my roof?"
What's bigger than the Milky Way?
Michael Jackson's nose.
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
What is money called in space?
Star bucks.
How does NASA organize a party? -- They planet.
Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock?
Because it’s a little meteor.
Fun fact: Most of the black holes in the universe are found in Africa!
What music do Astronauts listen to?
Nep-tunes.
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Watson replied, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson pondered for a minute.
"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets." "Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo." "Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three." "Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant." "Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow." "What does it tell you, Holmes?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Watson, you idiot. Someone has stolen our tent!"
Which way did the cow jump over the moon?
- The Milky Way!
Why couldn't the astronaut put the helmet on his head?
Because he didn't have enough space.
What's an astronaut's favorite candy? A Milky Way!
Stormtrooper: What should we do with this coffee?
Palpatine: Brew it!
What do you call a passport for Mandalorians?
A Pre Visa!
Astronauts just found water on Mars! Mars: 1. Africa: 0.
You're so fat, astronomers discovered a planet larger than Earth but smaller than Uranus.
I've sadly received a rejection letter from NASA. Strangely, it says there's no space on their training program.