That jokes

What do you call someone that no one loves?

An orphan.

You're so fat that when you went outside, you broke the 2-meter rule for COVID.

My girlfriend is growing watermelons, not in the ground though (we had fun that night)!

What does the plane that hit the Twin Towers and milk have in common?

My dad went to get both and never came back.

Did you see that car crash today where the guy got the entire left side of his body cut off?

He's all right now.

My ex was an orphan as a child.

I should have taken that as the first sign.

If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?

Where did little billy go when he was stuck in a minefield... everywhere.

That joke was pretty dark, but it got pretty light for a second.

You know they say, when you get lemons make lemonade... Well, I took that a little bit too literal.

Turns out squeezing your wife's tits as hard as you can hurts them.

But at least lemonade came out!

Your hairline is so far back that when I put on my glasses, I thought I saw an "M" for McDonald's on your hairline.

His hairline is so ugly that Martin Luther King had a dream about it.

Your mom is so fat that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Your mom is so fat, that burger.

Your forehead is so big that when you put glasses on top of your head, it falls off.

You know stairs, right? The dark... My there is something. I know that if you fall down the stairs, your balls will be crushed!

Kid me: I lost my stick.

Teacher: No, you didn’t.

Kid me: How do you know that?

Teacher: It’s hanging out of your pants.

A cop pulls me over and asks if I have been drinking.

I'm an honest person and say yes, I did, so I take off my sunglasses and tell him that I now had 2 glasses less.

What happened to the cheetah that took too many baths?

The cheetah became spotless!

I got a bowl of rice that you're formed like, an ice cube.

Your sister is so ugly that she made an onion cry.

Your hairline is so far back that it killed the dinosaurs.