That jokes
I love bread so much that I might join a bread cult.
What’s cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!
Your hairline's so far back that Usain Bolt had to run 50 miles away from you!
The pie tasted weird today.
Then I realized that my mother likes cooking pie with human flesh from C town.
Yo, hairline go so far back that your dad found it before you did.
Yo mama is so ugly that her portraits hang themselves.
South Tower: Man, that was da bomb.
North Tower: No, that was da plane.
When the feminists find out that it's humanity, not huwomanity.
Why should a feminist never join the United Auto Workers, UAW?
Because the only thing that a feminist would do in the United Auto Workers, UAW is lick pussy all day in the woman's restroom.
I never make that type of joke. They always seem to crash and burn.
Hey Siri, what’s in my bank account?
You stupid shit, piece of elephant crap, you’re so ugly that when you were born, your nickname was bastard! You’re so ugly, that your crush fainted in front of you and was proclaimed dead! You’re so ugly that-
(Destroys phone cutely)
Your hairline recedes so far back that it defends your forehead.
"Hola soy Dora, do you see Donald Trump? That’s right, he’s at my house, and he’s building a wall to separate me and Caillou. And Mami won’t let him, so she was walled alive!"
My friend said that gay people existed 10 years ago.
He can tell the future.
Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*
Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"
Chris Hemsworth is Australian, and Thor is from space. Does that make him an Australien?
"Nun" means no one likes them. Just take off that dumb hood!
Were you born on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen.
One day my kid with no arms came up to me and said, "Mom, what's dark humor?" I thought about it, then said, "Go wave to that blind person." He just looked at me, confused, but angry.
A man tried to tame a horse, but always failed. The news spread around town that this man couldn’t tame one single horse.
One day, the man went to a bar, where a fairly old man sat next to him. “Well partner!” He began. “I guess your dream horse is more of a NIGHT-MARE!”