That jokes

Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.

I went to see my doctor today and I asked him how come every time I have sex my eyes hurt.

He said that’s a common reaction to pepper spray.

My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.

Someone complimented my parking today! They left a sweet note on my windshield that said, “Parking fine.”

Calling you an idiot would be an insult to stupid people. You're much worse than that.

Stephen Hawking is better than NASA. They study black holes that are 8 billion years old, while he was down here on Earth staring at 14-year-old black holes. 😈😈😈

Your mom is so stupid that she thought LGBTQ was a sandwich.

Your mom is so dumb that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.

What was the comment that Vice President Harris said in the United States Senate when a blue dog democrat in the United States Senate called Vice President Harris a bitch?

Kibbles 'N Bits!! Kibbles 'N Bits!! I is going to get me some Kibbles 'N Bits!!

My grandmother made her passage on the Titanic. The ship was not the only thing that went down.

That one depressed friend.

Bro, yesterday this bird made the weirdest chirp. It sounded something like this:

"Error code 6, 4, 4, 2, sound: bird call, failed to play, government drone 0, 7, 7, 5 requires maintenance."

Anyone know what bird that is?

Did you know that they are making a movie about the four boys who lost their lives on the ice? They're calling the movie "The Lost Boys."

Yo, so poor that you wash your paper plates and cutlery in a kids' dishwasher.

You are so adopted that you don't have a home button on Google Maps.

What is a joke that will never end even though you want it to?

For me, life.

Roses are red, violets are blue,

I have a traitor friend, and that is YOU.

Girl, you are so ugly that when you look in the mirror, it shatters, more than your relationship.

You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat, a running person behind you shouted, "Taxi!"

Your forehead is so big that it said, "To be continued."