That jokes

There are times I miss you, that I wish I could remember where I hid your body.

Why does Lincoln like Ronnie Anne?

She is the only one that calls me "lamo."

Hey, can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives you two nights in a row.

If trees were sentient, they would make their furniture out of bone, flesh, and blood.

Now ain't that cool?

I done a thing where we have chat hangouts with people that like Gwen or just want to hang out, do stuff.

All people are invited!

We have a lot! Enjoy!

What do you call a plate that lies? Dish-onest!

What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back?

A stick.

China shouldn't play baseball because that would take out the whole world with one bat.

I had a dream that I was destroying the world, and I blew up my house for fun. I woke up and couldn't find my pillow... nor the house.

What do you call a bee that produces milk? Booby.

Edward Scissorhands: Why is it that every time I touch someone, they get offended?

Kids: Because you're a psycho path.

You're so ugly that when your mama had you, she tried to give you away, but there was nowhere to give you.

You're so full of shit that the toilet's jealous.

Don’t feel bad about this day because there’s a saying: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present."

Your mama's so fat that when she went to space, there was no space left.

Your mama's so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, you can see Micah.

"9/11 people" say that jet fuel cannot melt steel beams.

My sister thinks she's sooooo smart. She said that the only food that makes you cry is onions, therefore I threw a coconut at her.

Me: Okay, Papyrus. I'm no Sherlock Bones, but I'd say that Storyspin Sans is the Imposter.

Your momma is so dumb that when they said it was chilly outside, she came outside with a bowl.