That jokes

Why don't churches have WiFi?

They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.

Your mama so white that her first number was 911.

Your momma's so fat that she is the Earth!

You're so ugly that I choked and died.

"Don't worry! Life goes on."

"Yeah, that's what's had me worried."

You're so small that when you go to the doctor, he doesn’t know you're there.

They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. That's why orphanages exist!

Yo Mama is so FAT, it wasn't an iceberg that sank it, she was called, "THE MAMABERG!"

How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."

Man: I'm here for the job interview.

Employer: Oh good, good. Sit down. We don't get many people for the interviews.

Man: Just anywhere?

Employer: Yeah, make yourself comfortable. Jackson, right?

Man: Yeah, that's me.

(Shakes hands and sits back down)

Employer: So what makes you eligible for the job, Jackson?

Man: Well, I'm really good at capturing the perfect shot and angle. It really takes dedication to do this type of job. Concentration and willpower, sir.

Employer: I like you already, you're hired!

Man: Wow, thanks, sir. I know I won't do you wrong. I'll work hard for this job!

Employer: You start now! Your first person is a man named John F Kennedy.

Man: What? You want me to just take pictures of him during the parade?

Employer: No.

Man: This... This is a photography job, right?

Employer: No... this is a job employment for man hunting.

OWWWWWWWWWWW I JUST GOT A CUT ON MY BUTT. Oh wait, that’s always been there.

Roses are red, pussies are wet, when it goes in he gets upset. She said it's too small, so that's all. But later that day, he wanted to say, "Every time I play, no one complains, so she was just lying." She started flying, went out of her seat, the skirt went up, the greatest of them all. Everyone said, "Fly away big chunky balls."

Your forehead's so big that you dream in 4k.

My friend: "Ess, stop with the self-harm jokes it's not funny."

Me: "C'mon it's not that deep."

"Hey, is that a peach?"

*gets slapped on the butt*

"Noted."

You're so fat that when you were born, the nurse mistook you for the father.

If I don't find a reason to live soon, my ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's gonna be hanging from my ceiling.

I asked someone why they were crying. They told me that they had to abort their twins.

Then someone yelled "DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE!"

I have trash so I throw it at my sister and say that she is a trash can.

My grandpa kept warning the people on the Titanic that the boat was going to sink. Result: he got kicked out of the movie theater.