Tell jokes
Friend: How's it going?
Me: Good, things are good!
Parent: How are you?
Me: Oh, I'm fine!
Twitter: Compose new tweet?
Me: Hellooooo, I would like to tell you about my anxiety & my current greatest fears & let's talk about the impending apocalypse while we're at it.
Let's tell a secret about each other... I'll go first.
I
hate
you!
Who tells the best chicken jokes?
Comedi-hens!
So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?
Me: I hit an orphan!
Mom: OMG WHY?
Me: Not like they can tell their parents-
corporate wants u to tell the difference
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
"What do you tell a person with depression?
Just hang in there, buddy!"
If you are a bully at a school, when you get home, find an orphan and beat them up!
What are they going to do? Tell the orphan lady to tell you to stop? 😆😝
Teacher: What's 55 flowers plus 67 flowers?
Kid: A garden?
Teacher: Did I tell you that you're adopted?
If you have a bad day, go tell an orphan to find his parents. He will be searching all day.
Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*
Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.
Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?
Tell me a joke about sodium.
Na.
When Knife tells Annoying Orange, "I'm trying something new," Annoying Orange said, "Oh no, are you having a midknife crisis?" and then Annoying Orange laughs.
If your sis makes you mad, so go to your friend's home to play.
If your sis is sad, go tell Mom.
Can you tell me the real answer to this joke?
What do you call a drone that takes the long way around?
Why should you never tell your French doctor that you bite your tongue?
Because your French doctor will give you a tetanus shot.
I'm bone dry in material, but I have a skeleTON of skeleton jokes. After I tell you all these rib ticklers, you will have a bone to pick with if you didn't find that funny, you outta rip my spine out.
Three conspiracy theories walked into a bar, now tell me that's not a coincidence!
I didn’t wanna tell you, but I had to write this song, cause I’m in your house every night doin' your mom.
Why can’t you tell JFK facts about Dallas?
Last time he was there, he got his mind blown.