Tell jokes

Teacher: What's 55 flowers plus 67 flowers?

Kid: A garden?

Teacher: Did I tell you that you're adopted?

So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?

Me: I hit an orphan!

Mom: OMG WHY?

Me: Not like they can tell their parents-

"What do you tell a person with depression?

Just hang in there, buddy!"

What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?

They cry...

They scream... with joy.

"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."

Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...

Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*

Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.

Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?

I would tell you an abortion joke, but it was only temporary.

Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?

A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.

If you have a bad day, go tell an orphan to find his parents. He will be searching all day.

Tell me a joke about sodium.

Na.

When Knife tells Annoying Orange, "I'm trying something new," Annoying Orange said, "Oh no, are you having a midknife crisis?" and then Annoying Orange laughs.

If your sis makes you mad, so go to your friend's home to play.

If your sis is sad, go tell Mom.

Can you tell me the real answer to this joke?

What do you call a drone that takes the long way around?

Why should you never tell your French doctor that you bite your tongue?

Because your French doctor will give you a tetanus shot.

Let's tell a secret about each other... I'll go first.

I

hate

you!

Who tells the best chicken jokes?

Comedi-hens!

I was in class doing sex education. We were learning about sexual stereotypes.

My teacher turns to the class and asks, "If anyone could tell him what a sexual stereotype was?"

So I raised my hand and said, "Asians have small penis." He looked at me and said, "Very good, but I was looking for a definition."

Once a man goes to a restaurant. Then, he was waiting until the waitress comes and tells him that they don't have food.

He was grumpy, but the waitress make him relaxing by unbuttoning her pants and undressing her panties and uncovering clothes from her pussy until everything get striped, then she say to him: "Good meal."

A man walks into a bar. He sees a family court judge, his wife, her lawyer, and a police officer. He gets on his hands and knees and prays to God out loud. The bartender says, "Why are you praying?" He says, "Because I just saw the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse, and the bible tells me when I see them the end is at hand."

How to make an orphan die?

Tell them to yell until their folks come home.