Tell jokes

How do you break an orphan's wall in their room in the orphanage?

Tell them to put a tally on the wall with a pen for every second their parents are missing.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I tell you, you look pretty, but all you do is look like a poo.

Mom said drugs are my enemies. God said love your enemies. What do I tell her?

It's hard to tell if people are interested in joining my Sarcastic Club or not.

Qwen, I have to tell you something, so say "hi" and I will tell you.

I went for a walk today, and I did a good job of telling what time it was.

I would tell a joke about my abusive dad, but I can only think of the punchline.

If you ever get bored, just punch an orphan in the face. What's he going to do? Tell his parents?

For the encore, we'd love to tell you a construction joke but... we're still working on it.

I'd tell a child abuse joke, but I forget the punchline.

I wasn't going to tell another rape joke but fuck it.

I was going to tell a ghost joke, but it just seemed so mean-spirited.

So I went to a mall and I was finna buy something... and I saw a little boy and he said "hello," so then I passed by him and he said "hi," and I was like "hi nigga," and he said, "um, just wondering something... I mean I like jokes, but what is dark humor?" And I was like "umm🤔.. it's like 🤔🤔...like you see that guy without legs? Tell him to stand up"... and he said "I'm blind nigga" and I said "exactly homie"... aight nigga peace and look out😏😉

1st graders: Ay yo girl, I think you’re beautiful, let’s get married!!

2nd graders: Uhh, don’t tell my mom that we’re dating!! She won’t let me date! Let’s keep this a seeeeecret heeheehee.

3rd graders: Uh, my teacher told me to stay after school because I wrote a poem about you and I’m 9 years old, we have to break up, sweetie.

4th graders: Hey, I think you’re cute!! Wanna date? I don’t think my girlfriend will mind.......

5th graders (they start wearing makeup): Ay girl, your eyelashes are pretty, I like you now, wanna date? Here’s my numberrrrrr.

6th graders: Heyyyyy, I gotta tell you a secret, I got a crush on you!! Don’t tell anyone!! Byeee, ooh, I’ll text you later!

7th graders: We need to make Peyton jealous because she broke up with you!! Wanna date? I mean, you’re not hot, but still, great personalityyyyy, alright, bye now.

8th graders: Hi sweetheart, I got STARRRBUCKKKSSS

Me: UGLY AF AND LITERALLY NO BOYFRIEND.....

Hi, this is a good prank I did.

So, my brother LOVES his phone and so... I put it in the toilet and then flushed it, but it wouldn't go down. So, then I gave it to him and he threw it and then it broke. HAHAHAHAHAHA

(Prankster, tell me if you don't like me doing pranks because it is your thing.)

Bye guys! I hope you liked this prank! (And his phone did not really break, it just cracked really bad lol)

What do you tell your butt cheek when you need to use the bathroom? "Hold it in, so you won't get constipated and die."

What did the mommy tomato tell the little tomato?

You better ketchup!

What did Stephen Hawking's wife say to him when he came home drunk?

Nothing... she couldn't tell.

Can I tell you a cat joke?

Yes, 'cause it's purr-fect.

Attention to everyone - I will be leaving for 3 weeks for a summer break. I will be back in 3 weeks. When I come back, I want someone to tell me everything that has happened over these weeks. (Gwen or Addison Banks).

Sincerely, watersharky.