Telephone jokes
Man from 2001 just called. They want a tower back.
Person: My left ear is ringing.
Friend: Then answer it!
Why can't Asian people use a telephone?
Because they might wing the wrong number.
Cheer for fun on the telephone and singing, "We are family!" Even then, your dad, really, he's fat, just like your dad. And your mom's fat ass, b**** ass, looking like an Oompa Loompa self, looking like an ugly.
Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says to the other, "What do you think about that mad cow disease?"
The other replies, "Well I don't have to worry about it. You're talking to a telephone pole."
The cleverness of the students 😍
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number. You answered the wrong telephone.
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone. (Wing, wing, halo.)
What is the fastest way to spread a rumor?
Telephone? No.
Television? No.
How then? Tell a woman!
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone. Wing-wing Halo?
When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 and 976 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone, and money falls out.
You have more chins than a Hong Kong telephone book!
How does a blonde punish her blind son? She takes away his TV privileges.
How does a blonde punish her deaf son? She takes away his telephone privileges.
How does a blonde punish her paraplegic son? She gives him a spanking.
What could've the Towers done to not start 9/11?
Call 911.
What do you say to a fat Asian?
You got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
What? A telephone? Nah, I'm using a telebone.
Best chick ever.
Call me at 6969696969.
Yo momma's so stupid, her family tree is a telephone pole.
Head teacher talking about recent vandalism during school assembly:
"And to those of you who wrote Mr. Smith's telephone number on the door of the girl's toilets, he would like to make it clear that the last digit is a 7 and not a 4."
Why couldn't the blonde dial 911?
She couldn't find the 11.
Chinese Names - Annie Wan (Anyone)
Caller: "Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?"
Operator: "Yes, you can speak to me."
Caller: "No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!"
Operator: "You are talking to someone! Who is this?"
Caller: "I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent."
Operator: "I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?"
Caller: "Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one) was involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one) got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital."
Operator: "Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious, but I don't have time for this!"
Caller: "You are so rude! Who are you?"
Operator: "I'm Saw Lee (Sorry)."
Caller: "Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!"