Technology

Technology jokes

Printer

I was in a library and a black guy came up to me.

"Where's the coloured printer?" he said.

"Mate, it's 2025, you can use any printer you want," I replied.

Woman

Secretly, I’m a woman catfishing gay men on Grindr. When a notification from the app went off, my son told me, “I’ve heard that sound. Daddy has that game, too!”

Memes

Fortnite

What were the Fortnite kid's last words? "I didn't know pumps are back in the game!"

Vpn

For all the Harry Potter fans:

A VPN is occlumency for smart devices, and our ISP is a legilimens.

Wife

Wife: (on phone) Hi. Husband: Hey, I didn’t know dishwashers talk and make me a sandwich.

WiFi

How do you make Stephen Hawking mad?

You turn off the WiFi router.

Hospital

I went to see my grandfather in the hospital because I wanted to get to know him better before he passed, maybe take a selfie with him. But when I got there my phone died, so I unplugged a vacuum to plug in my phone. And it turns out he only knows Spanish, so when he kept saying, "Me desconectaste el soporte de mi vida," I thought he wanted water. But when I got back with the water he was asleep, and now my phone was charged, so I translated what he said. And it was, "You unplugged my life support." That's when I called the doctor...

Good news is, I got one sick selfie!

Death

Why did Steven Hawking die?

He lost Wi-Fi connection and didn't get the data plan.

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  • Song

    What songs do people with no arms listen to?

    None, 'cause they can’t press play.

    Orphan

    I got my orphan kid a phone. She was pressing the home button, but it didn't work.

    Test

    What was the one test that Steven Hawking couldn't pass?

    reCAPTCHA

    Steven Hawking

    Daughter: Mommy, what ever happened to Steven Hawking?

    Mother: He died.

    Daughter: How did he die?

    Mother: He never got recharged.

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