Technology jokes

Steven Hawking had dark humor.

Whenever he turned on his laugh effect, it diverted power from his screen brightness.

Christopher Walkin: "This is a literal universal remote! It actually controls your life! You can pause, you can rewi-"

Me: power button.

Hatsune Miku is not from an anime.

Roses are red, I'm not a boaster.

Elon must've got rushed to the hospital after impregnating a toaster.

I bet emos get jealous when their phone dies.

Two Indians talk over a long distance using smoke signals.

In the middle of the conversation, a nuclear bomb explodes behind one of them, and a huge cloud of smoke rises silently into the sky.

The other Indian signals with smoke: "Not so loud!"

What is the difference between an orphan and a TV?

One has more channels.

What does the Trump administration use instead of emails? Alternative fax.

How do you make a dishwasher work again?

Smack her ass and say "get back to work!"

Why are Black people getting stronger?

Because the TVs are getting bigger.

Yo mama so ugly, when I put her next to a naked mole rat, it said "bluetooth connected."

What does Jeff Bezos do before he goes to sleep?

He puts his PJ-Amazon!

Apple made a new product for Chinese people called the iOpener.

Yo mama so ugly, when she went to unlock her phone with her face, it said, "disconnected."

I can go to Walmart and scan my wrists. It'll say "antidepressants." ✨

Why aren't apple chargers called apple juice? Also, how do you throw away trash cans?

I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.

I brought a new pen that can write underwater. It can also write other words.

What did the HP say to a Dell?

Hello!

What's a dying person's least favorite app? TikTok.