I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.
Christopher Walkin: "This is a literal universal remote! It actually controls your life! You can pause, you can rewi-"
Me: power button.
Apple made a new product for Chinese people called the iOpener.
Was invited to the inauguration of an I-pad.
We were all ready to begin the event. I was supposed to cut the ribbons, but before I could do that, Penaldo jumped outta nowhere and shouted, "I DON'T WANT I-PAD, I ONLY WANT TO STATPAD!"
Shame on Penaldo for ruining the event! 😡
I hope Stephen Hawking's an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-cart.
What's a dying person's least favorite app? TikTok.
Why do bugs hate the internet?
Because they always get caught.
Get it? Inter-net?
Steven Hawking had dark humor.
Whenever he turned on his laugh effect, it diverted power from his screen brightness.
Hatsune Miku is not from an anime.
Yo mama so ugly, when I put her next to a naked mole rat, it said "bluetooth connected."
Why do orphans always have the newest iPhone?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
Why are Black people getting stronger?
Because the TVs are getting bigger.
What is the difference between an orphan and a TV?
One has more channels.
I bet emos get jealous when their phone dies.
What do you call a digital hamburger? Processed meat.
Why did the doorbell have a good sense of humor?
Because it got everybody's pokes!
What did the HP say to a Dell?
Hello!
I brought a new pen that can write underwater. It can also write other words.
Two Indians talk over a long distance using smoke signals.
In the middle of the conversation, a nuclear bomb explodes behind one of them, and a huge cloud of smoke rises silently into the sky.
The other Indian signals with smoke: "Not so loud!"
I just heard that the inventor of the autocorrect died the other day.
May he rest in pizza.
