Technology jokes

Hi, I...

Sorry, my cat touched my computer. I don't know how to delete.

The joke is that if you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?

Sorry guys, it's a hard word to spell.

Video games don't make people violent, lag does.

Did you hear about the new German microwave? It has ten seats in it.

Is Stephen Hawking under warranty? If so, can I bring him back to Currys PC World?

Police arrested a man who dropped his phone in the ocean. The was charged with a salt in battery.

What did the mincrater do when his Xbox turns off?

He raged! 😱

What do you call an iPhone put into a smoothie maker?--An Apple smoothie.

Why are we depressed? Is it because of that bully in your school, or because you have acne? How about when you listen to your sad song playlist? Maybe it's because you have no friends? Or is it the fact your anime girlfriend is fake? T^T

So many bots commenting so fúcking fix it!

Scientist time travels into the year 2024.

Scientist: So, what happened with the storming of Area 51?

Pedestrian: Oh, you mean The 51 Massacre?

How does he go for a poo? He logs out.

My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.

What were Stephen Hawking's last words? "System failure."

I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."

The only reason he died was because Virgin Media wifi crashed.

I just got a text on my cell. Bone be right back ;)

What do TVs and girls have in common?

They both show you stuff when you turn them on!

Hi everyone, my mom got me an iPad today, and this is really cool. Can someone tell me what decapitation is?

Do you think Stephen Hawking could ever plug his Instagram or anything?

You used to call me on your cellphone when you need my love.

Mad girl: SHUT UP! YOU ARE SO ANNOYING! I DON'T WANT TO CALL YOU ON MY CELL PHONE!