Teacher jokes

I had a teacher named Mr. Stubs. I asked why he was given that name, and he replied, "My parents said my limbs were spare parts."

I pulled my kid out of school after a woke teacher taught my six-year-old about pronouns! Yesterday, it was "he/she," today, "they/it," tomorrow, "I/you/we!"

When you were late to school and your teacher called you tardy, she meant that in more ways than one.

What did Rengoku say to his class?

"Set your school ablaze!"

Why did the rapper become a MATH TEACHER?

Because he was good with bars and beats.

I miss seeing my friends and teachers.

One day, a chemistry teacher asked his student, whose name is Raj, "What is the chemical formula of water?"

The Raj replied, "HIJKLMNO."

The teacher asked, "What is this rubbish?"

The Raj replied, "Yesterday, you taught the chemical formula of water is H2O."

Don't you hate when you have sex with your teacher, then remember you're home schooled?

Kid: Hey, Dad.

Dad: You're an hour late.

Kid: No, it was two hours. Also, I was working on math.

Dad: By yourself?

Kid: No.

Dad: A boy?

Kid: I was with the teacher.

Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.

Teacher: Tim, where are your parents? It's been 15 minutes!

Tim (Orphan): Yeah um, they can't come.

Teacher: Why not?

Tim: They're too busy working in heaven.

Some weird kid came into school today with his tagging gun. He tagged my friend really good. At the end, he tagged 12 students and 1 teacher. VICTORY ROAYAL ✌

My teacher said, "Words don't hurt!"

So I threw my dictionary at her.

Do you know the teacher that went up in space? She had blew eyes. One blew this way and one blew that way.

Why can’t a blind person be a teacher? Because they can’t control their pupils.

Do you know the teacher that went up into space?

You know what her husband said to her? "I will feed the dog; you feed the fish."

Your hairline so bad that when your teacher puts you to sit in the front of the class, your hairline be all the way in the back.

What do you call a teacher who never farts in public? A private tutor.

I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.

We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.

I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.