I miss seeing my friends and teachers.
Me: Mrs., can I read my book?
Teacher: Sure.
Me: *watching my Chromebook*
Teacher to Student: You are supposed to be here at 9 am!
Student: Oh, did I miss anything?
Teacher: Tim, where are your parents? It's been 15 minutes!
Tim (Orphan): Yeah um, they can't come.
Teacher: Why not?
Tim: They're too busy working in heaven.
Some weird kid came into school today with his tagging gun. He tagged my friend really good. At the end, he tagged 12 students and 1 teacher. VICTORY ROAYAL ✌
Timmy Turner: I wish the Vegan Teacher was a cheeseburger.
Wanda: Ok, Timmy.
Timmy: Cosmo, bring her to me!
Cosmo: Here you go, Timmy.
*Timmy eats Miss Kadie*
Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? Idaho, Alaska?
What it actually means: Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? I don’t know. I’ll ask her.
P.S. My dad is a history teacher and he told me to put this in here.
My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.
It was really heavy on me.
Alright class, the person who answers my next question gets to go home.
Then a guy throws a pencil. The teacher asks, "Who threw that pencil?" "I did, I get to go home."
When a 68 year old teacher says: "I am going to tackle an intruder if I have to!"
Me: "Oh hell nah"
True story: my math teacher Mr. Ueberoth accidentally marked a Kahoot as 100 points in Google Classroom instead of 10. If he doesn't find out, the grades will be more hyperinflated than Zimbabwe's economy.
I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.
I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.
Your hairline so bad that when your teacher puts you to sit in the front of the class, your hairline be all the way in the back.
My science teacher was talking about natural selection.
At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.
If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."
Mum finds out child cheats in math test.
Mom says, "There is no cheating in this house."
Child: "Then why did you cheat with my math teacher last night?"
The teacher made us present a slideshow to introduce ourselves.
Mine is bright and colorful with music. It was so good that a kid started dancing!
Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.
Why did the rapper become a MATH TEACHER?
Because he was good with bars and beats.
Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.
That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman:
