Taste jokes

I would tell you a joke about a slice of pizza, but it's really... cheesy. I donut think you will come up with a better pun than this.

A girl comes up to her dad and says, "Can I borrow the car tonight? I want to go to this party." Dad says, "If you give a head job..." The girl says, "You're my dad! How can you say that?" Dad says, "If you want the car..." The girl thinks, "Okay." She starts. Dad says, "That tastes like sh*t." Dad: "Yeah, your brother wanted the car this morning."

I like pepper.

Why did the shark spit out the clown?

Because he tasted funny!

Okay, so I ate an apple and it tasted good.

God creates a wasp :)

God: Okay, so make it reeeeally tiny. Like less than half a fly.

Angel: okay... a bug.

God: now give it's face a sword, but it has a hole so it's basically a mouth.

Angel: weird.. but okay...

God: and give it wings.

Angel: eh, not half bad Go-

God: NOW MAKE IT EAT THE BLOOD OF ALL LIVING ANIMALS AND HUMANS

Angel: *shook* o-okay

God: okay. Now make sure whenever a human is bit it feels the pain of a million suns burning it, making it scratch until it bleeds out.

Angel: . - .

God: and make sure it also transfers diseases through the species. Give 'em a taste 'o that! *evil grin*

Angel: *cries*

Angel: *whispers; I'm so sorry..*

1. My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.

2. Oh, you’re talking to me? I thought you only talked behind my back.

3. My name must taste good because it’s always in your mouth.

Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.

What do you call a gay drive by?

A fruit roll up.

TASTE THE RAINBOW BITCH!!!

Question: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?

Answer: Because they taste funny!

Man, choking on sugar seems like the sweetest way to die.

This shit is disgusting but funny.

Son: Dad, do you remember your first blowjob?

Dad: Ohhh yeah, I do!

Son: How did it taste?

Dad: Get out.

Dark jokes are like food, not everybody gets it.

If you’re forced to have it as a child, you won’t like it as an adult.

I guess Hitler was forced to have vegetables when he was younger.

There was a dude. He had a mondo dong.

His wife was like, "Yo, where are your balls?"

The dude says he left them in the fridge. His wife replies, "I knew those meatballs tasted weird!"

Wanna hear a pizza joke?

Never mind, it's too cheesy.

So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot. My first reaction was "Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!"

My boyfriend recently asked me to suck his cock. I was kinda nervous because I’ve never tasted a dick, but he said it doesn’t taste that bad, so I’ll give it a shot.

What's a hamburger's favorite color?

Burgundy.