Q. Why didn't Jeffery Dahmer eat comedians? A. He thought they tasted funny.
Little Sally comes home from school one day and says to her mom, "Mommy, mommy, you won’t believe it! Little Johnny just pulled out his PP in class." The mother responded, "Well, what did it look like?" Sally said, "It looks like a peanut." The mother said, "Oh, it was small." "No, it was salty," said Sally.
First bite: Oh my God!
Second bite: Oh my, God!
How do you know you had a gay cookout?
All the hotdogs taste like ass.
A guy is walking down the street when he almost steps in something. He looks down and says, "Looks like shit."
He crouches down and smells it, "Smells like shit."
He sticks his finger in, tastes it, "Tastes like shit."
He then smiles and says, "Well, good thing I didn't step on it!"
Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?
Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.
What the can say to the tomato?
Tomato tomato potato potato find twelve recipe for the both 👍🏾
I put on ingredient sticker read for tasting good.
What's a prostitute's favorite snack?
Skittles. They love to taste the rainbow.
How can you tell your best friend is gay?
His meat tastes like shit.
I saw my sisters masturbating with cucumbers and hotdogs.
I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like hotdogs and cucumbers!"
How did the cannibal know the girl he was eating for dinner had COVID-19?
She lost her taste.
John pretended to be a doctor.
Motu came to him. He said, "I lost my hunger."
John brought some samosas for his lunch. Motu ate them. John said, "Your hunger is back!"
Then, Motu said, "I lost my taste."
John said, "Number 1, bring some water." Motu drank it and said, "This is petrol!" John said, "Your taste is back!"
Motu said, "I lost my memory."
John said, "Number 1, bring some medicine." Motu said, "But Number 1 brought water." John said, "Your memory is back!"
How do blind people know when to stop wiping?
With a taste test.
What do you think fish tasted like before women started swimming?
If Slade were a vegetable, he’d be a BRUSSELS SPROUT... small, bitter, and NOBODY wants him at the table.
If LEO were a spice, she’d be flour... BLAND and FORGETTABLE!
Why do gay men hate periods?
They prefer Collins.
How do you get a white girl to suck your dick?
Put ranch dressing on it.
What does it mean when a man has a dodgy past? It means he has skeletons in his closet.
What does it mean when a man likes Lana Del Rey better than Ed Sheeran? It means he has a closet full of women's leather pants (but no women in their dating history).
Humor is like skin; the darker it gets, the less people like it.
