What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?slap it on the arse and tell it to keep going
guy: Say "I'm a man" every time I stop. person: guy: you walk into a bar. person: I'm a man guy:you meet a girl person: I'm a man guy:you and the girl go to a hotel\ person: I'm a man guy:you guys go on a bed person: I'm a man. guy:she whispers into your ear person:I'm a man
Me: Know one likes shrek he is just a fat green guy friend hey stop talking about me
A hired gun gets on a private plane to his next contract. Halfway through the trip, he notices the plane rapidly losing altitude. So he opens that back of the plane and starts tossing out everything he doesn't need. Grenades, guns, ammo unless it was bolted down it went out. He stopped throwing things out when the plane started to regain altitude. When the plane lands, he sees some kids giggling on the side of the road. "What's so funny?", he asks. "Daddy farted and the house blew up," said a singed little boy.
Stop making 9/11 jokes, my father died in a plane crash.
Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.
2 times 4 is 8 now stop fucking asking me
How do you know your baby is dead? It stopped screaming after not feeding the bastard for a month.
So a kid walks in the house and says: " mommy, mommy, I found daddy". And the mother says: " stop digging around in the garden, and let you Father rest in peace.
You'll end up DEAD if you don't stop COFFIN!!!
What did the grape say to the banana stop graping me.
stop the dead baby jokes where running out of babys
Just watched an upsetting video. Please retweet. #Stop The Make A Wish Foundation.
What does a cat say when it's angry? - Stop stressing meowt! ššššš
If you think no one cares about you, stop paying your taxes
Two old Indian ladies out picking Potato's one ladie stops staring at this huge potato turning it round and round . The other old Ladie sais to her what are you doing she sais these potato's remind me of my ((husbands nuts )) she sais oh my are they really that BIG she said no there that dirty. lololol
Stop joking about suicide, it's not funny. You people must be so ignorant to be able to joke about such serious issues that you clearly are uneducated on.
A bicurious man goes to a gar bar A gay man offers him a drink The bi man explains he doesnt know if hes gay or not Thats fine he says lets just have a drink The gay man asks him for a dance and he explains again he isnt sure if hes gay or not. Eventually the gay man invites him to go home with him to hang out as friends. They get to his house and the gay man says, do you fancy having sex? He isnt sure so the gay man explains ill push in slow and at any point you want to stop make animal sounds and if you like it starr singing.so they get to it and the gay man pushs in slowly, the bi man bursts out "MOOOOO MOOOOO MOOOOOOVVVEE CCLOSSEEERRRR
Me and my friend went to the park, after a while we grabbed our little princess and said "it's time to go sweetie" but before we could go someone said "stop them they have my daughter!"
Phone Rings; Are your parents home? Orphan; Stop calling here.
I will always remember my grandpa's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"
