Still Jokes

What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. What's worse than that? The baby at the bottom of the pile is still alive. What's worse than that? The baby at the bottom of pile is eating its way out.

Kobe would still be alive if he would’ve gone to jail for raping that girl.

There was a race between Lettuce a faucet and Ketchup. The lettuce was a-head, the faucet was still running and the ketchup was trying to ketchup

Someone: PLEASE EAT I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE *Me tryna remember how long it would take me to die of starvation because ive already googled it and given up because it takes too long* Me: Na yeah I still have 19 days left

when the south tower saw the north tower collapse he say I'm still standing.

what makes a healthy normal man different to a disabled man? "im still standing, yeah yeah yeah" (from elton john)

An asain went to bed at 9:00 woke up at 6 people say he still sleeping

Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat? Because if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.

what did the blind kid get for his birtday? Idk he still didnt look

Why am I still alive? Pills give me stomache, blood makes faint, height frightens me...

What's got 5 arms, 3 legs and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon. 7_What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? GLOVES! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet...

What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))

I told her she needed to put her dog on a leash and her boyfriend is still on a leash to this day 😮‍💨

what do you call an orphan if every other orphan gets picked? someone: ugly? me: no, trick question, they are still and orphan.

China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.

Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while we was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.

They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.

A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an exposition to the Amazon Forest. After a while they get lost. So as they are walking suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says "Hey, your in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren't that crazy so we will let you choose how you die." The man from France said, "bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "bring me the gun" And the man from New York said, "bring me a fork" The guy was confused with the fork but still brought it the items and gave it to them. The guy from France said, "for the France!" And drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, "long live the queen!" And shot himself and died. And the man from New York started stabbing himself with the fork and said "MAKE A CANOE OUT OF THIS YOU FUCKERS"

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? One at the bottom that's still alive. What's worse than that? Its forced to eat its way out. What's even worse than that? It comes back for seconds.