What are the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
Only one of them stops sucking after you slap it.
When you know that everyone thinks you're a hoe.
WHEN Y'ALL ARE MY HOES!
How do you call a Goth with feelings?
Emomotional.
What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench?
The bench can support its family.
How do you put "blonde" and "duh" in the same sentence? Just say, "Blondes are dumb."
Blonde 1: Omg! Yesterday, I fucked a Brazilian!
Blonde 2: OMG YOU SLUT
Also Blonde 2: Wait, how much is a Brazilian?
What's the difference between Jeffrey Dahmer and an Emo?
They're both gay and use knives.
Quiet Kid: *reaches into bag*
Teacher: EVERYBODY RUN!
Q: What do a blond girl and a tornado have in common? A: There's a lot of blowing and sucking, then you lose your house.
Women be like men cause wars, [but] forget men fight those wars while they fake cry.
Women be like men are trash, [but] forgets women raised those men.
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?
Suck a big cock.
If you thought an inner-city black boy cannot transform into a deranged pale Karen... well, just look at Michael Jackson.
Why can't a citizen in communist China, especially a Chinese male who is between 18-29 years old, buy a box of condoms in a drug store in communist China?
Because the condom would be too big for the penis of Chinese men in communist China.
An adopted kid is walking to school when an emo kid approaches him. He says the emo kid, "Do you have rope?"
"No," replies the adopted kid.
"Dang it! I hate you," says the emo kid. "Now the adopted one is angry. Well, at least I'm loved," says the adopted kid.
If you know an emo kid, please stay away. The depression is contagious. I'm a survivor.
Like if you dislike emos.
How many South Africans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A Brazilian.
How do you know if an Asian has been in your house?
Your dog's gone.
Your finances are done.
And your floaties.
I like this Russian girl, but she hasn't asked me to hang off a cliff while drinking vodka.
You calling me gay, but the pole is straighter than you.
So, I am an emo dude, so I sit in the back of the class, and I talk to no one.
But one day this dude came up to me and tried to talk to me, so I just ignored him. Then he got really pissed off and said, "I'm gonna kill you." I was like, "You're gonna kill me just because I ignored you? Is your ego that big, wow?" He left. Then the next day he brought his goons with him and said, "Now you're dead." I ignored him again, and he said, "You will pay for this."
So the following day after school I was walking down the street back to my house. Then he and his goons tried to attack me, but then they died, so I kept on walking. I had some rope traps set.
This was the best day of my life.
This is why you never mess with emos. We have ropes everywhere.
