What do you call a teenage boy who doesn’t masturbate?
A liar.
Yo mama is such a slut, she could get slapped by a pack of hot dogs and get pregnant.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Answer: Special forces.
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
Yo mama so old, she was a waitress at the last supper.
Why are gay men better than straight women?
Because gay men are more willing to look after kids once they swallow them.
What's the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid?
One has a functioning neck.
How do you disrespect an Asian?
Give them driving lessons.
What do you call 4 black guys and 2 white guys?
The Oreo Gang!
How do you make someone in Africa disappointed?
Sing "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head."
What do hockey players and Surrey girls have in common?
They both only change their pads after every third period!
Why is Santa always so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
A gay guy and a trucker get in a car crash.
The gay guy says, "Somebody call the police! This man just rammed into me!"
The trucker says, "What the fuck did you just say, fucker? Get over here, I'm gonna wreck your ass!"
The gay man then says, "It's okay, everybody, don't call the police! He wants to negotiate."
Why do Asians excel at math?
Because their dog can never eat their homework.
Why do emos suck at playing tic-tac-toe on their wrists?
Because when they win, they lose.
What do KFC and a brothel have in common?
They’re both full of greasy chicks.
Why do Blondes never suffer from headaches?
No brain, no pain.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th grade. Which one is the sexiest?
The blonde, because she’s the only one who’s 18.
What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
You pull the pin and throw it back!
What do you call a stoned kid with Down syndrome?
A baked potato.
