Your hairline and my car go Lighting McQueen speed because he never came back with the milk.
What is more fun than spinning a clown around on a clothes line at 100 miles an hour?
Stopping it with a pitchfork.
You say to your slow friend: "Damn, you're slower than Stephen Hawking!" And that takes some talent.
Sonic says: "Gotta go fast!"
The Hulk SMASH!
Orphan says: "Gotta go home!"
died and came back sped. i call that rien-tardation
Yo mama is so slow, when she stepped on the highway they had to order a crane to come move her from starting traffic.
I can't tell what's farther, the Great Wall of China, or how far Paul Walker flew out of his windshield.
Why did the fastest cat get kicked out of school?
He was a cheetah.
Why can't cheetahs play any games?
Because they're cheetahs!
Are you a race car?
Cuz I’m tryna fuck.
What should we want?
Racecars.
When should we want them?
NEOWWWWWWWWWWWM!
Superman was bored and wanted to go out. He called all his super friends, but they were all busy. He even calls Louis, but it's her time of the month.
He flies to the liquor store and buys some beer and gets drunk. As he is flying, he sees Wonder Woman naked on top of the roof. He starts thinking, "I will fly down and have sex with her sooooo fast," BURP, "that she won't know what happened," HICKUP.
He flies to her faster than the speed of light, BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG, and flies away with a smile. He passes out and crashed into a wall.
Wonder Woman jumps up and screams, "WHAT WAS THAT?"
The Invisible Man appears, holding his butt, and he gets off on Wonder Woman and says, "I don't know, but my butt hurts real bad."
Pilot: This is my last flight, everyone.
Passengers: *Clap*
Pilot: I became a pilot for one reason: To conquer my greatest fear.
Flight Attendant: And what is that?
Pilot: Dying alone. *speeds up towards Twin Towers*
Also the Pilot: Now who is ready to play some Jen---
Why do animals have playing cards with foxes?
Because they’re a bunch of cheetahs!
Why did the cheetah need to fart on the lion? So he could win the race.
which falls faster an apple or an emo kid.
the apple because the emo kid is hanging
Why do cheetah always win the race because he cheats duh
One day when I was driving around our children's school with my wife, she saw a speed bump. She told me to slow on it, and when I did, we heard a loud, long scream.
Yo mama is so dumb, she put speed bumps on the race track.
Why did the wall fall over?
A drunk driver hit it going 90mph and died.
