Song jokes

Did you hear about the gay choirboy?

He choked on his first hymn.

What song do you play at an emo kid's funeral?

Van Halen's "Jump."

What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."

Why couldn't the pony sing a song?

He was a little horse.

ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG

Give me freedom. Give me fire. Give me contract, Or I retire.

Jog all day, Out of UCL now. FC Barcelona, I need you now.

Villarreal defenders, They surround me. Big submarines, All around me.

I get upset. Call my agent. I want money. I’m impatient.

What’s a downy's favorite song? Down Under.

I'm lookin' for some good jokes for the best song award. Can y'all help a fellow out?

Why doesn't Adele swim properly?

Because she's rolling in the deep. 🤽‍♂️

I cannot believe Kelly Clarkson's music is considered pop! More like comatose music!

Why can Elsa hold a balloon? She will "Let It Go"!

I only listen to waltz 3/4 of the time.

Do you know the murderer, The murderer, the murderer, Do you know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?

Yes, I know the murderer, The murderer, the murderer, Yes, I know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane.

It's been known that Michael Jackson decided to do a song for the soundtrack for Free Willy, because he thought that he would get free willy in exchange for composing a song.

Paul Walker made a new wrap cover, it's called "Flying Through the Windshield," and the song's name is "Crossing the Street."

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite song??

Rollin' and Controllin'.

What is love? Baby, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more!

What music do depressed people listen to?

"I Believe I Can Fly."

They call me Mr. Distracted, truly a spastic. Can't talk to my folks cause they say I'm pro- problematic. Really fantastic. Can't focus unless I take meds then it's magic. My brain is like traffic, always fucking active. But never at the right time, pretty fucking tragic it happens.

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation."

Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.

The frog says $30,000.

The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.

Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what the heck is this?"

The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

What’s a sheep’s favorite song?

"Baby Don’t Herd Me."