Society jokes
Dear doctor,
I've heard it's a good sign when women scream your first name during sex, but recently women have been screaming my full name. It's weird, I feel like I'm famous. Can you tell me what this means?
Yours Truly, Ray Palp
Most controversial types of matter:
1. Dark matter 2. Anti-matter 3. Black Lives Matter.
People who make these jokes are plain crazy, more crazy than Islamic extremists.
Two people about to have sex realize they have no lube.
In their desperate, horny haste, they looked for the nearest "Downy" and asked it, "Speak into my hand."
Upon their return to the bed, they regretted it immediately because his dick just stayed down...
Ever heard the saying white people can’t jump??
Well, I think that’s total bullshit. You should have seen us on 9/11!
What's the sound that dwarfs make when they have sex?
Broken plates.
An Indian kid walked into the shop and had a curry down because they had no naan bread in stock.
What’s the difference between Santa and an orphan? Nothing; they don’t have parents.
Why are there no women in the NFL?
Commissioner Roger Goodell firmly believes in equal opportunity, so the girl tries out. Then, if she makes the team, we gangbang her to death. I mean, could you imagine what a scary birch she'd have to be?
Q: How do you make a fire?
A: Oil and dead babies.
What do you call a bunch of wheelchairs on top of one another?
A vegetable rack.
Why does Sally have no friends? Because she is obese.
You can make fun of adopted kids all you want. What are they going to do, tell their parents on you? Lol.
I am an Indian joke.
What happens when the orphan at school gets sent home?
What do you call an 18-year-old orphan?
Homeless.
What do you call a black person?
Dark humor.
A disabled kid kept throwing up in class.
So I threw him out the window!
In a thick Russian accent:
"Let's buy some vodka, pollute the earth with oil, and make insecure nuclear power plants that break all the time! Ah, yes. The mother land. A great place to be. Not like those stupid Ukrainian people who are living happy lives, they are crazy and need to die."
How to get rich:
Step 1: Tell an orphan he will get a family.
Step 2: Knock out the orphan.
Step 3: Cut open the orphan.
Step 4: Well there [are] organs.
Step 5: Do it again.
And nobody will call the cops 'cause they got no family.