Society jokes

Why do they call priests "father?" Because it's too suspicious to call him "daddy!"

What's a cannibal's favorite place?

A day care.

What do you call an orphan's family photo?

A selfie.

God, people are so sensitive these days. You can't even say, "Paint the wall black," you have to say, "Jamal, could you paint the wall?"

In America, you find Waldo.

In Soviet Russia, Waldo finds you.

What's the difference between a pair of jeans and an African baby?

A pair of jeans only has 1 fly.

Why did the orphan become a prostitute?

They wanted somebody to call "daddy."

Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”

Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. “Mein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”

Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. “You see, no one cares about the Jews.”

I'm 34 and I went on a date with my 19 year old girlfriend. I got heckled with "you're a paedophile!" and "you sick F...!" Completely ruined our 10th anniversary!

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They can't find home.

Did you hear about the racist sprinkler?

It kept going: "Spick spick spick Chink chink chink!"

I saw a kid crying and I asked him, "Where are his parents?"

God, I love working at orphanages!

What's the difference between sand and food? Africans have plenty of sand.

How do Chinese people name their children?

They throw pots and pans down the stairs and listen for the sounds, "Ching Chong Chang."

Touch Down.

Do you know where priests go at night?

To all night sale at Boys R Us.

An old professor’s class used to begin with a dirty joke.

Following one particularly vulgar joke, the girls in the class decided to walk out the next time he began.

When the professor learned of this planned protest, he came in the next morning and said, “Good morning, class. Did you hear about the scarcity of whores in Newfoundland?”

With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.

“Wait, ladies,” called the professor, “The boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”

I was driving through a neighborhood when I saw a sign that said "Autistic Child Zone." Then I thought to myself, "Oh shit, that wasn't a dog!"

If you see a woman get raped, just walk away. Don't bother helping. They're independent women, after all.

Communism jokes aren't funny unless everyone gets it.