Society jokes
What's a cannibal's favorite place?
A day care.
Why do they call priests "father?" Because it's too suspicious to call him "daddy!"
What do you call an orphan's family photo?
A selfie.
What do you call a fat person in a wheelchair?
A broken wheelchair.
What's the difference between a pair of jeans and an African baby?
A pair of jeans only has 1 fly.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
They wanted somebody to call "daddy."
Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes into a bank, they turn off the cameras.
I saw a kid crying and I asked him, "Where are his parents?"
God, I love working at orphanages!
A white guy was telling his friend about this girl he hooked up with. His friend asks, "Did you get her number?"
He replies, "No, but it's okay, I'll see her at the next family reunion!"
Being incest isn't that bad. I was fingering my sister, and I found my dad's old wedding ring. Winner winner!
I'm 34 and I went on a date with my 19 year old girlfriend. I got heckled with "you're a paedophile!" and "you sick F...!" Completely ruined our 10th anniversary!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
What's the difference between sand and food? Africans have plenty of sand.
How do Chinese people name their children?
They throw pots and pans down the stairs and listen for the sounds, "Ching Chong Chang."
Do you know where priests go at night?
To all night sale at Boys R Us.
Touch Down.
Hippity Hoppity, women are my property.
Bippity Boppity, get the f*ck off my property!
An old professor’s class used to begin with a dirty joke.
Following one particularly vulgar joke, the girls in the class decided to walk out the next time he began.
When the professor learned of this planned protest, he came in the next morning and said, “Good morning, class. Did you hear about the scarcity of whores in Newfoundland?”
With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.
“Wait, ladies,” called the professor, “The boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”
If you see a woman get raped, just walk away. Don't bother helping. They're independent women, after all.
I was driving through a neighborhood when I saw a sign that said "Autistic Child Zone." Then I thought to myself, "Oh shit, that wasn't a dog!"