Size jokes
Your mini pecker is so small, the taxi driver said the ride was so short that he'd do it for free.
Your mum is so fat, when I was driving I had to swerve to avoid [her]. By the time I had finished, I had ran out of gas.
Yo mama so fat.
She is the reason why people think that the Earth is flat.
Yo mama so fat, even Bob the Builder said, "We can't fix that!"
My friends' titties are bigger than my sakuras.
"5 dollars if a fat guy can find his penis."
Earth is smaller than Uranus, wth?
Yo head so big I can skate on yo head.
I'm talking bout real real big, set a plate on yo head, charge a phone on yo head, build a home on yo head, studio wide, write a song on yo head.
Q: My scale had my phone number on it. Wandering why, I looked up only to see an elephant in my face...
Yo momma so fat!
She's so fat that when she steps onto a wood floor, the floorboard doesn't creak, it screams: "Goddamn!!!" before it snaps from the weight.
Why is Dawayne so small? Because his parents cut him up into small slices!
Yo mama so tall, she eats paramedics.
"The size doesn’t matter" - Ana from Frozen.
You say this to your friend, "Damn, your nuts are bigger than mine!" *thinks the wrong way*.
Friend: I must order more nuts.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
You’re so short, you could sweep under your bed while standing.
You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.
You're so short that you don't have to open the front door to get inside the house.
You're so short that you build a tiny house for yourself.