Size jokes

I wonder why the baseball was getting larger and larger, then it hit me.

Yo mama so short that when she plays mini golf, it's just called golf.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger.

Then it hit me.

What do you call a midget that waves at you?

A microwave.

Yo mama so fat, when she sat on the iPod...

SHE MADE THE IPAD!!!!!!!

I thought the dryer made my clothes shrink.

Turns out it was the fridge.

I ran into a fat woman today. She said next time, don't hit me. I said I don't think I have enough gas to go around.

Then the ground started to rumble with every step she took.

Your mama is so fat, she needs two phones to take a picture of herself.

Your mama so fat, she caused a traffic jam just by crossing the street.

The earth used to be flat until your mama was buried.

You're so fat that when they tried to print a picture of you through the computer, they couldn't fit you in the whole picture because you were so big!

Your forehead is deeper than the ocean.

Yo mama is so fat that when she fell over, she created the Grand Canyon.

Why are clips 30 rounds? Because that's the average class size.

Your mom's ass is so petite and big, I'd pound that till the Earth shakes.

Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!

There were three Indians that got kicked out of the tribe.

One said, "Me find food," and he came back with a decent size rabbit. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see rabbit, me shoot rabbit, and rabbit fall down dead."

The 2nd Indian, "Me find food." He came back with a good sized deer. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see deer, me shoot deer, deer fall down dead."

The third Indian said, "Me find food." He came back crawling, missing a leg and an arm, and he was all cut up. The others asked what happened. He said, "Me see train, me shoot train, train no stop!"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Atoms are small, But so are you!

Your forehead looks like the inside of a Malteser.

"SCOOT WANT TAXI!" Ok, maybe I do but can't make it there because yo mama is so fat he can't hear me on the other side.