Size jokes
Your daddy's so fat, he tripped over a rock. He thought it was a chip.
What's the food orphans can't eat?
Family-sized ice cream.
Your forehead so big you got to go outside to think.
Momma's so fat, she can use her belly button as a breakfast bowl.
For any bag of chips, it's considered family size.
Q: Why is it good being an orphan?
A: Because the family sized bag is all there's.
Your mom is so fat, when she swam in the sea, Wales came up to her and said, "We are family, even now you’re fatter than me."
Yo momma so fat, when she pulled out the chair, it screamed and broke itself.
Your mamma is so fat that she has a gravitational pull.
I thought the Sahara was the largest desert until I saw your forehead.
Your mama so fat she sunk the HMS ship!
What is tall when it's young but short when it's old?
A candle or a pencil!
Yo mama so fat even Nationwide can't be on her side.
73 Earths can fit in Uranus.
What do you call a short fortune-teller that escaped from jail?
A small medium at large.
Your mamma is so fat that she saved me a lot of money by sitting in my car when I wanted to buy a low rider.
Yo mama so fat...
Yo mama so short that when she plays mini golf, it's just called golf.
What do you call a midget that waves at you?
A microwave.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger.
Then it hit me.