Size jokes
Why do you call a fat midget?
Jiggly Puff.
Yo mama so fat, I saw her eat with 3 utensils: A spoon, a knife, and a FORKLIFT.
My forehead so big,
big like Biggie Smalls. I love cock, please bum my hole.
Hi.
Yo mama is so fat, a rogue shadowstepped her and got a loading screen.
Hey guess what...
What...
My penis is big.
Yo mama so fat Trump built a wall around her and not the border.
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumeference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger, then it hit me :3
I tell short people to reach for the stars.
They are always a bit short of reach.
Why do orphans hate family-size candy?
Because they can't share it with their family.
The fat kid asked the teacher, "Is Godzilla real?" The teacher said, "They're standing right in front of me."
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
Your mama so fat, when she asked for a water bed they put a blanket over the Pacific Ocean.
Your momma is so fat, she can't even go skinny dipping.
All normal-sized babies are delivered by stork.
Heavier babies are delivered by crane.
Why is Ronan's forehead the size of Jupiter? Because he dropped the TV on his forehead. It also had rings.
Why is Jupiter's ring stuck in orbit? Because Ronan's forehead kept it stuck in orbit.
Snails are like sperm, slow and sloppy.
To start, I'm a big fella in size.
I saw a skinny guy act like Santa, so I went over to him. "You can't pull that off," I said. He said, "Then you try it." He gave me the Santa suit, and I dressed up. He walked by and saw me with 45 kids in line to sit on my lap and tell me what they wanted for Christmas.
Boobs are like batteries...
AA will get the job done...
C is bigger than AA...
D is bigger that C...
...and if they're square, you don't want to put your tongue on them!
Calculate my dick, virgins!
Yo mama so fat, she plays ping pong with the planets.