Size jokes
Yo mama's so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," he asked her to move out of the way.
Yo mama is so fat, I thought she was a beach whale.
What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?
A small medium at large!
Tonight, I picked up an anorexic prostitute.
It was really easy because she was only about 90 pounds.
Yo mama so fat that when she was in Uranus, she picked her butthole.
Yo mama so fat that when he was talking to a man, her bowels fell out.
Yo mama so fat that John Cena couldn’t get her down with an Attitude Adjustment!
Yo mama so fat, when she had an interview for NASA, they said, "We don't hire planets."
Your hairline is so big, it counts as its own planet.
How did the hamburger know he needed new pants?
His buns were too tight.
Your forehead is so big, I thought it was Mount Chiliad.
Yo mama so fat, she had to have 5 doorways to get anywhere!
Yo mama so fat, she fell over. Nobody laughed, but the ground cracked up.
You're so skinny, you can barely fit through a door crack.
What is 6 inches tall when bricked up and is loved by women?
A strong man’s biceps.
Yo ass so fat that you can't see your toes.
When you go to the movies, you take up seven rows.
You’ve really gotta hand it to short people because they usually can’t reach it anyway.
You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."
You're so fat that when you stepped on a scale, it said, "To be continued..."
Your momma is so fat, when she got in the Pacific, she became the Pacific Ocean.
Your mama's so ugly, she got everything for free.