Similarity

Similarity jokes

Emo

What are the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights?

They are both going to be hanging from a tree.

Orphan

How are orphans and blind kids similar?

They both have never seen their parents :)

Gay People

Islamist guys and American Christian right-wing guys are both similar in that both abhor the existence of gay people, but only the Christian Right loves to eat sausages, especially the little ones, if you know what I mean...

Potato

People are like potatoes.

We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.

Vein

Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?

Because everything they do is in vein.

Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".

Spiderman

What's the similarities between Spiderman and a homeless person?

They both have no way home!

Giant

How are giants and strippers alike?

They both grind men's bones to make their bread.

9/11

You know, I like my girls how I like my 9/11: Two twins that go down easy.

Hare

Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head?

Because from a distance, they looked like hare.

Sloth

What is the similarity between a sloth and a depressed kid?

They both hang from trees.

Blonde

What's a similarity between blondes and a vacuum cleaner?

You have to turn them on before they start to suck.

Crash

What’s similar between the twin towers and Kobe Bryant?

They both can crash down.

Class

What's the main similarity between an elementary school math class and the USA?

The class divides.

Bomb

What is the similarity of a bomb and a baby?

When you drop them both, everyone screams.

Assassination

What makes a 360 no-scope and JFK's assassination similar?

Both were some of the greatest achievements in history to achieve.