Short jokes
I lost all faith in humanity. I am moving to Uranus; it's really big. I might get lost.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because KFC was offering free seeds.
What do you call Canadian weed? Canadabis.
Guy: You won't eat a human, so why do you eat meat?
Other Guy: It is bold of you to think I won't eat a human.
My mom smashed my Xbox, so I smashed her daughter. 😏
Yo momma so ugly, her blood type is puss.
Singing in the shower is fun, until you get soap in your mouth.
Then it's a soap opera.
I like my girls like my file systems...
FAT and 16.
What do you call a singer who can't make a song?
Taylor Swift.
I was doin' your mom, yes yours!
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Sorry man... I kinda messed those things up.
Yo mama is so ugly, her self-portraits hanged themselves.
Us three get along well. I guess you could say we're the TREE-o!
Google 'dancing Israelis'.
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time.
Call me a bad economy with high interest rates and low spending, 'cause I'm in a great depression.
Some people say I like heights; others say I'm a daredevil.
In reality, I like killing myself.
My name is Giselle.
Number 1 ventriloquist dies at age 76, will be mist.