Short jokes
When your friend does a finger-gun and his dad appears behind him and does it too, with the real deal!
Guy: shows girlfriend his dick.
Girlfriend: "Cool, where is it?"
Jack and Jill went up the hill for drunkin' wild sex.
Jack went by Jill to get a lick, and watched Jill get off on a stick.
I like my Oreos how I like my victims... Drowning.
What does a bar fly and a necrophiliac have in common?
They both enjoy a cold one once in a while.
When you're in the middle of a test and you hear gun shots.
Why don’t Asians get stung by bees?
Because they are always expected to get “A’s.”
The sexy towers are just like my sexy toes because when I crashed a plane into the tower, it burned and bled.
How to kill a blond: put a scratch & sniff in a pool.
If a clown farted, would it smell funny?
Stand in the corner.
What's the difference between cancer and a Nazi? Cancer doesn't discriminate.
My mom told me to unplug all the electronics, so I unplugged my grandma's life support.
Is depression sadness or happiness? I call it a fun time.
Barney-1 2 3 what number comes next?
Barney-that’s right it’s penis!
Later (DYM 125)
If 7 8 9, why was 10 scared?
Because he was between 9 11.
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home.
Orphan: Oh, cool, something we have in common.
Your teeth are so yellow they slow down traffic.
How did the man with a small penis become a rapist? His condom fell off.