Short jokes
I impaled my son with a pitchfork...
He looks very sharp.
Your hairline is so messed up, I thought a 2-year-old cut you up!
Where do gorillas get all the "pussy" from? The strip club, which is called "Poker Kong Night."
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I didn't get the joke at first, then it hit me like a plane.
What was the last thing that went through Aiden's head before he died?
His elbow.
I hit my friend.
He's dead now.
Why don't you use a dull pencil?
Because there's no point. 😐😑😑
What’s black, white, and red? A nun that fell down a 100 flight of stairs.
What’s black, white, and laughing? The nun that pushed her!
You know we straight with doin' your mom.
Don't you just want to go on a mass murder while listening to goodbye Moonman? Oh, just me... OK.
This year the London marathon was run on your hairline. It was so far back no one could complete it!
What do you call people from Paris?
Parasites.
What does "bitch" mean?
Son asked father, father said it means "you're handsome." Son said, "OK, you're a bitch." Father: "Of course not, I'm not a bitch!"
Mary had a lamb. Her fleece was black as coal. When I tried to touch it that night, next day I went to court.
Knock! Knock!
Who’s there? Control Freak. Con… OK, now you say, “Control Freak who?”
Uranus is a gas giant.
Why do orphans suck at baseball? Because they never could play catch.
When the husband said "Is your ass so big?" she said "Because I am holding my shit."
The world exploded, so now I need to visit Uranus.