Short jokes
What’s it called when you give an emo some rope as a present?
Murder.
I came across a pic of the oldest man on earth on IG. He was 132 years old.
I commented "age is just a number" for him; now I'm banned.
What do you call dolls in a line?
Barbie queuing.
What do Kurt Cobain and an emo kid have in common?
They both smell like "Teen Spirit."
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarterback!
Your forehead is so big I could use it to get free TV.
What will you call Burj Khalifa after 100 years?
"Bujurg" Khalifa. (Just a joke)
How do we get a butt? God made us like that, and we can't change it. If you wanted to, you have to die <:
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.
What's the difference between Jesus and a gay person?
One created the rainbow, the other one ruined it.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ken.
Ken who?
Can you walk the dog for me?
Welcome to Morgan's Morgue and Pizzeria where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!
What did the tree say when it gets horny? My wood has a splinter.
What's a snake's favorite subject?
Well, there are two: hisss-tory, but some prefer maths; those weirdos are adders.
It’s me back at it again.
The earth was flat till they buried yo mama!!!
When your mum tells you to help your granny And you in plug life support.
You’re so ugly, I can see why your dad left now.
What do you get when you mix a lemon and a cat?
A sourpuss.
Y'all gay asf yaya.
What does a car have when it's very itchy?
A road rash.