Short jokes
Every second, 1 kid gets diagnosed with homework.
What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?
Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...
One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.
"What?" Angelica replied.
"I'm a guy."
You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat, a running person behind you shouted, "Taxi!"
An Asian student was learning logarithm in class. He wrote down his name after the question. The teacher asked why. He replied, "My class ID is number 1."
What's the difference between a paralyzed kid and a father?
The father gets to leave, while the kid stays.
What do emos and ninjas both have in common? They both hide and cut things.
Me calling the orphan kid from school: "Hello, are your parents home?"
The orphan kid: *starts sobbing* "STOP CALLING HERE!"
"Suicide bomber kills 44 people in Pakistan mosque." Damn, that's a crazy K/D. He must be hacking.
What happens if you inhale too much nitrous oxide (laughing gas)?
You die of laughter.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite button?
Light mode.
You're the sun in my life, now get 93 million miles away from me.
They tried to make me laugh, but I was already DYING.
I once saw a noose joke.
I wanna know how to make one :D
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't make a homerun. 😂😂
How do you get a depressed person to jump?
Put them on a bridge.
I told a Chinese man, "Which is better, cats or dogs?"
He said, "Dogs."
I said, "Why?"
He said, "Because dogs tasted better than cats."
I told a furry, "Don't call yourself a joke!" I said to the furry, "Joke has meanings."
We gotta keep it goin' ▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一.
You: Bro, this school picture is soooo ugly!! (Points to yours).
Me: Bruh, you just typed up mirror!