Short jokes
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One to trust and the other to thrust.
What do you call an Iraqi who owns a camel and a goat?
Bisexual.
Why did Bruce Jenner cross the road?
To see how the other side felt!
How can you tell if someone Amish is an alcoholic? They keep falling off the wagon.
What did one orphan say to the other one?
"Get in the Batmobile, Robin."
Better Friday the 13th than any Monday.
What's the difference between a hipster and a hockey player? A hockey player changes his pads every third period.
What do you call two natives in a ditch?
A sleepover.
What do you call a terrorist attack in Iraq? A selfie!
Did you know that good Catholic girls like to WAP?
Yeah, they are all about Worship and Prayer.
Did you know Kurt had dandruff?
Found his head and shoulders behind the couch.
What is Mexicans' favorite sport?
Cross-country.
What do the Twin Tower survivors order from Tim Hortons? A plane bagel.
I thought about making a necrophilia joke, but I knew it would be a DOA.
I should probably stop making jokes about bulimia. They just leave a bad taste in my mouth.
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is it murder-suicide?
World leaders are so old, they've got nostalgia for the Cambrian explosion.
Q. What does a slutty mermaid get? A. Crabs.
Q. What's a necrophiliac's favorite dating site? A. Find a Grave.
Why can't you kill a hooker?
Because they're dead inside anyway.