Short jokes
Why do New Zealanders have sex with sheep on the edge of cliffs? They push back harder.
What is a pedophile's favorite age range?
9-11.
What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench?
The bench can support its family.
Why'd my grandpa fall over?
'Cause I clapped his cheeks, fool!
What was Stephen Hawking's name before he got his disease?
Stephen Walkins.
Hey guys! Wanna hear a joke?
-You guys- sure
Ok! -insert every game with a copy and paste/slender in the thumbnail-
If the minions serve whoever is the biggest bad, then who did they serve 1930-1945?
Why did the basketball player not get on the bus?
Because he couldn’t be caught travelling! 😂
Girlfriend: "Would you still love me if I was a figment of your imagination?"
My schizophrenic ass: Of course I would.
Dude, people gotta stop letting 9/11 jokes fly around like bro, you're gonna make my brain explode!
What do a blonde chick and a field of wheat have in common?
They're both bound to get plowed at some point in time.
My teacher asked everyone how tall their grandparents were. I responded, "My grandpa is 5ft 10, and my grandma is -6ft."
What did the baker say when he forgot the cookie sheets?
Ooh, snickerdoodles!
3 people having sex is a threesome, 2 is a twosome. So next time someone calls you 'HANDSOME', don't take it as a compliment!
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To get to the other side of the TRACK.
What can you do if you can't bear sharing the same blood as your father who raped you?
Have a blood transfusion.
As a child, my mother always told me she was going horse riding. My whole life changed when I found out she was under the horse.
Why am I gay?
Because I like mushrooms.
Fail and fall mean the same thing when it’s downstairs.
Q: Two skeletons walk into a bar. What happens?
A: They fall.
(They walked into a BAR, as in a rod or whatnot.)