Short jokes
A truck carrying Vicks VapoRub overturned on the highway. Amazingly, there was no congestion for eight hours straight.
How do oysters call their friends?
On shell phones!
What is the strongest creature in the sea?
A mussel!
What do we want? Plane noises!
When do we need it? Neeooooooowwwww!
Why did the fridge have lots of friends?
Cause it was COOL.
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
He had nobody to go with.
Why couldn't Cinders use horses to pull the Pumpkin Coach?
Because they were too busy playing stable tennis!
Do you need an ark?
Because I Noah guy!
What is a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it’s the "R," but it’s actually the "C".
Where do cows stop to drink?
The Milky Way!
I saw a piece of cheese and it told me a joke, but the joke was too cheesy.
I stepped on a cornflake. They accused me of being a serial killer.
Why is the mermaid so dirty?
Because she is a maid, mer-maid!
What is hard about having a relationship with an astronaut?
They are always so distant! :-]
What has four legs and one arm?
A rottweiler at a park.
What's the difference between a Doberman Pinscher and a Social Worker?
Eventually, you can get a baby back from a Doberman Pinscher.
Before: Caring & Noble.
After: Chernobyl.
How many fingers does the Dragonborn have?
Four fingers and a Thu'um.
How does an American know that his time has come?
He starts hearing Vietnamese.
Why didn't the skeleton go to prom?
He was dead. You fool. You fell for my trick. I'm very heartless.
Oh wait.
You fool!