Short jokes
Q. Why couldn't Terri Schiavo give good blow jobs?
A. She didn't know how to swallow.
S, ss, slalom. A.
Why don't you shower with a Pokemon? He might Pikachú.
Tung tung tung sahur. Three tungs when you say his name? So many tungs I oughta call you a polyglot.
Two baked beans traveled around Australia.
They both ended up in Cairns.
Why did the black guy cross the street to check King Van?
What’s something Bill Cosby and Freddy Krueger have in common?
Once you fall asleep, you’re fucked.
what is the fastest country? iran.
Donald Trump is, like, really orange.
Why did the first boob say to the 2nd boob: "Between us, I have to take a tit."
Why did Bruce Jenner cross the road?
To see how the other side felt!
In an alternate universe: I don't know how to solve the power of 10, but I do know how to pay taxes.
One man walks up to another and says, "Hey, did you hear about the kidnapping at Main Street?" The guy says, "No." The other guy says, "Oh, he woke up."
What do you call an orphan family? None existent.
Who are the fastest readers?
The pilots on 9/11. They went through six stories in 5 seconds.
Orphan jokes? They protest.
What's the difference between a mother and a father? The mother always comes back from the shop.
What is Instagram called in USA?
Instaounce.
What's a Parkinson's victim's least favorite song?
Taylor Swift - "Shake it Off".
Steven Hawking's death, you should've gotten a case.