Short jokes
Having sex while camping is fucking in tents (intense).
A guy walks into a mosque... then blows up.
When your friend does a finger-gun and his dad appears behind him and does it too, with the real deal!
What's red and bubbly and scratches at the microwave glass?
A baby in the microwave!
What happened the night Stephen Hawking came home wasted?
Nothing... wife couldn’t tell.
What if little Johnny was doing drugs?
"Johnny, Johnny?"
"Yes, Papa?"
"Eating sugar?"
"No, Papa..."
What did the kid with Down syndrome say to his friend?
Nothing, he had no friends.
A 98 year old man goes to bed on a one layer bed. He wakes up under it...
I’d make a rape joke, but I don't wanna force that on you too.
I had a dream of swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it is just a FANTAsea.
What does NASA stand for?
Neil Armweak Sorry Armstrong.
Why is the bald eagle bald?
Because it has no hair.
It has feathers. LOL.
Why do Jews have big noses?
Because air is free...
Why did the rapper become a painter?
To brush up on his rhymes!
Mother: "Sweetie, make a Christmas wish."
Girl: "I wish that Santa will send some clothes to those naked girls in papa's computer."
Where did Jeffrey Epstein go to college?
Bring them young.
I heard Steven Spielberg is coming out with a new movie about fat people called E.C.
(Extra Cholesterol)
Fight in the comments.
How are corpses like pools?
Once you get in, it's only cold for like a minute.
They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.