Short jokes
Teacher: Take a seat, class.
Wheelchair person: I've been in the seat.
People shouldn’t be afraid during a zombie apocalypse.
They can stay in their living room.
Why did Sally cross the road?
She didn’t wear her seatbelt.
At first I was skeptical, but the universe has really grown on me.
What is the capital of Greece? -- About 10 dollars.
How do you stop a skunk from smelling?
Hold its nose.
Worst joke ever.
I can't believe I got fired at the calendar factory. I mean... all I did was take a day off!
What's a horse's favorite football player? NEIGH-mar!
I remember my uncle's last words:
"I don't think we're going shooting today."
Why did the grandmother put wheels on her rocking chair?
... she likes to rock and roll lol.
Why did people take Stephen Hawking's to the hospital when we should have took him to Curry's PC World?
Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?
Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
I just got a job at the prison library.
It has its prose and cons.
Wanna know how I got away from Iraq? Iran.
What's green and sings?
Elvis Parsley!
Why are birds good at social media?
Because they "tweet" all the time!?
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Cakatoo."
"Cakatoo who?"
"So, you're a Rooster now?"
My short friend called me a scrub, even though he was the one below me.
What's another name for an Incel? A feminist.
Muslims love to exaggerate, that's why they always blow things up.