Short jokes
What do you say to make a redhead mad?
Anything.
Orphan kids only play GTA5 so they can be wanted.
Why didn't the cows eat the lemon grass?
It made sour milk.
Morbid jokes are just like girlfriends. Not everyone gets it.
A 28-year-old medical student is auctioning off her virginity online.
For $300K, you can have the worst sex of your life.
When Ant-Man is the size of an atom, how can he breathe?
What happens if the dumbest person from Europe goes to the US?
The average IQ increases in both places.
What is a tornado's favorite game?
Twister!
What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?
An irrelephant.
What is the capital of Greece? -- About 10 dollars.
Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?
Because they have no body to go with.
The most corrupt CEOs are those of the pretzel companies.
They’re always so twisted!
What do ICE and Mexican drug cartels both have in common?
They both kidnap Canadian women!
The American Dream is real. It's just set and filmed in Toronto and not Texas.
What do you call a black person with a pride flag? A Cosmic Brownie.
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
What happens when a furry takes over Nazi Germany?
The Furred Reich.
Roses are red... Violets are blue... I feel like I'm gonna get raped next to you.
The couple next door made a porn film.
They don’t know it yet.
Be careful, everybody, I have a red dot on my forehead, so I can record everybody!