Short jokes

Short jokes

Child

Kids are like a box of chocolates, they taste so good and you never know what you are going to get.

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  • Gay

    God sent gays to fix overpopulation. Until they ended same-sex marriage.

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  • Teacher

    I was happy to find I could get a passing grade in all my subjects if I had sex with my teacher, until I remembered I'm home schooled.

    Pedophile

    What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?

    They both came from behind and crushed them.

    Friend

    My friend: "Ya mama so stupid, she sits on the TV and watches the couch!"

    Me: "That joke's older than your mom!"

    Plan B

    Why did the blonde chick buy two Plan B pills?

    She wanted to be for sure for sure!

    Race

    What do you call a Black person going down a waterslide? Sewage.

    Rapist

    What's the difference between me and a rapist?

    He forced her, while I convinced her with a candy.

    She was just 7 years old.

    Mission

    Why was my mate in "Mission: Impossible?" Because he couldn't find his dad.

    Army

    What do you call an army of autistic people with guns?

    Special forces.

    Pigeon

    Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?

    A: A suicide bomber.

    Priest

    What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"

    Life

    Wanna hear a joke? My life! Hahahah! Just kidding, jokes actually mean something...

    Robin

    More about Quinn: He loves Robin. He loves his tight ass. He licks up all his shit after Taco Bell.

    Loyalty

    Who is more loyal: a dog or a wife?

    Well, lock them both in your trunk for two hours and drive around and see which one is happy to see you.