Short jokes
I named my dog "J," and everyone thought I said "jam."
2, 4, 6, 8, you're staying up too late.
2, 4, 6, 8, all I do is master bait.
rat gaagah?
I was on a flight to California, but my next in the Empire State Building.
What movie does an orphan want for Christmas? "Spiderman: Homecoming";)
If sugar is a drug, does that mean putting it in coffee is overdose?
Being bullied by an artist? Want them to leave you alone?
www.VincentVanGoghAway.com
What is a panda's favorite cooking implement?
A pan-duh.
Am I a guard or a guava?
Your mum sat on a phone, and she turned it into a pancake.
Alien vs Predator.
Cosby vs E.T.
What's the most difficult thing about being a pediatric surgeon?
Keeping the scalpel steady while masturbating.
Were you born on the side of the highway because that’s where all mistakes happen?
Are multiple choice questions too easy?
A) Yes.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims. They went through 67 stories in 0.67 milliseconds.
"Dude come here and see a rabbit!"
"Ok!"
"Are you ok, man?"
"Yeah, I’m fine."
"Dude, pull your pants back up!"
Once my twin brother died from a plane crash. His last words were, "If it's a bomb, I'll give it a 9/11."
Violets are red, so is your face. I thought I was ugly, but then I saw you.
A blonde walks into a bar.
Ouch.
Hey Sandy.