Short jokes

Short jokes

Mama

Your mama's so fat, when she jumps in the pool, the water jumps out!

Dog

We were so poor when we were kids, dad used to jerk off the dog to feed the cat.

Serial Killer

Why did the serial killer cross the road? To get to the victim's house.

Knock, knock. Who's there? The serial killer.

Shit

What did one butt cheek say to the other?

"Together we can stop this shit!"

Orphan

Why did the orphan cry when the teacher yelled at him?

Because the teacher said, "Don't make me call your parents!"

Kid

What did the kid who has no arms get for Christmas?

He couldn't even open it.

Popcorn

Before I die, I'm going to ask to be cremated.

Then I'm going to eat a bunch of popcorn kernels.

Then I'll die and get cremated. BOOM! I'm popcorn!

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  • Pilot

    What did the pilots say before crashing into the Twin Towers?

    "We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we go through it!"

    Difference

    What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

    You can unscrew a light bulb.

    Student

    A 28-year-old medical student is auctioning off her virginity online.

    For $300K, you can have the worst sex of your life.