Short jokes
Why do emos like circles? Because they can hang out with them.
What do you call a pen with no head?
DeCAPitated.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite TV show?
Robot Wars.
What is the scariest thing you'll ever see in your life? James Charles thinking he has rights.
What did the skeleton say to the genderless child? "You're fucking dead, mate."
Why are drums and autistic people the same?
They both go "uh uh uh uh uh uh!"
Why are Mexicans so bad in the Olympics?
Because all the ones that can run, jump, and swim live in America.
What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?
Impossible!
A girl walks up to her friend with sunglasses she missed very much.
She told her, "Hey, long time no see."
Kids are like a box of chocolates, they taste so good and you never know what you are going to get.
God sent gays to fix overpopulation. Until they ended same-sex marriage.
What's the difference between a Palestinian and a redneck?
At least the redneck was drunk when he married his cousin.
Why did the terrorist cross the road?
To get to the airport!
Roses are red, just like your lips.
Mountains are big, just like your tits.
I didn't know I raped her. I thought she wanted me to hurry up.
What's the difference between me and a rapist?
He forced her, while I convinced her with a candy.
She was just 7 years old.
"Ching Chong ling long suck my ding dong."
I was digging in my backyard and I found gold, and I went to run and tell my mom, but I realized why I was digging in the backyard.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on a bungy jump?
Spasticelastic.
Q: What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in the bathtub?
A: Throw in some laundry.