The 60+ Best Donation Jokes

Today, a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

My cousin died last week he needed a blood transfusion but we didnt know his blood type he just kept saying "b positive b positive" but its hard to be positive with him gone

Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You wouldn't believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.

Dad: "I'm giving all your toys to the orphanage."

Kid: "Why are you doing that?"

Dad: "So you won't get bored there."

I donated 100 dollars to a blind children’s charity. Too bad they won’t ever see a dime of it.

What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? A prostitute won't tell you that it is more blessed to give than it is to receive.

Im doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled. Its called spastics on elastics

What is the difference between giving money to a church and giving money to the IRS? If you stop giving money to a church you won't go to prison

What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? You don't get something in return if you give money to a church.

Welcome to Dave's Orphanage. "You make it, we take it."

What is a glory hole at the adult bookstore used for? campaign contribution to the Republican Party

if you donate one kidney, everybody loves you, and you’re a total hero. but donate five, and suddenly everyone is yelling. geez!

There was a man named, Matt, that went to the church to confess one of his most recent sins. He told the priest, I am here to tell you my sins. He was all for it and said go ahead.

Matt, "Father, Last night I almost cheated on my wife"

Priest, "how so?"

Matt, "We were together naked, but we didn't do anything just rubbed each other, that's all"

Priest, " RUBBING TOGETHER IS THE SAME THING AS PUTTING IT IN! for your sins you must never see that woman again and put $50 in the donation box"

Matt, "okay i promise not to see her again"

Then Matt walks out the door

Priest, "Hey I saw you! you didn't put any money in the donation box!!"

Matt, "Yes I did, I took the money and rubbed it against the box because you said rubbing it is the same thing as putting it in"

A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: do you know how often people die from AIDS?

I said: now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.

I won the lottery for a million dollars today, so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity. -- I now have $999,999.75.

DAD:I'm bringing your toys to the orphanage

SON:why

DAD:your going to need them

What do chairs spend on the most?

Chair-ity

🍷 📺 What does the Bartles and Jaymes wine cooler television ad have in common with ministers who are ✝️ white christian nationalist? They both thank you for your financial support 👍 👍 👌 👌 😘 😘 😊 😊 💰 💰 💸 💸