Short jokes
"We've invented the spade!"
"Oh wow, this is ground-breaking!"
What’s the point in a cow going to the cinema? To be a-moo-sed!
My sister is so annoying. She won $10,000 to go to hell.
If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
Why did the roster cross the road twice?
To prove it was not a chicken.
You should go soul searching. Maybe you'll find one.
I've thought about suicide, but there's always been a part of me that knows I wouldn't be able to live with the decision.
Why do we put round pizzas in square boxes and eat them as triangles?
What do you call a religious drug addict?
A crystal methodist.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th grade. Which one is the sexiest?
The blonde, because she’s the only one who’s 18.
How does Hellen Keller meet men?
She goes on blind dates.
I cannot believe Kelly Clarkson's music is considered pop! More like comatose music!
What’s strong enough for a man, but made for a woman?
The back of my hand.
All these people on here making me wish I knew them IRL.
Americans: I will cook the pizza.
Italians: I cooka de pizza!
Me yelling every gay slur to get suspended.
I’m in catholic school.
Osama Bin Laden, Josef Stalin, and Hitler are robbing a bank, who do the cops shoot first?
A black guy.
People say that Pakistan is a terrorist nation...
Guys, it's not true, even Osama bin Laden lived there peacefully for 6 years.
The worst comedians take 9 months to make a joke. Then they spend the rest of their lives trying to forget it.
COVID-19 is like pasta.
Asians invented it, Italians spread it.